Tending The Endings

 

In this modern Western world, we LLLOOOVVVEEE new beginnings.

But we absolutely suck at endings.

The part no one wants to talk about is that good endings – truly, carefully, thoroughly tended endings – are what provide the rich, fertile soil for those new beginnings.

If you don’t give the endings as much attention, care, and respect as you give the new beginnings, you’re trying to create out of nothing.

 This is an ongoing, small-group container for learning to tend your endings – subtle and massive, cyclical or permanent, voluntary or involuntary, tangible or intangible.

We’ll be learning the processes of “tending,” and looking at what gets in our way when we don’t. We’ll be tending endings that are regular and repeated – the end of a week, a school year, a project – and endings that are permanent and unique – the end of a life, a relationship, a state of health, a phase of life.

We’ll make room for personal endings, communal endings, and collective endings – we are part of many interlocking systems, and loss is part of every face of life.

We’ll use a wide variety of doorways into this experience – words, certainly, but also body awareness and movement, energy practices, creative work, time in Nature, connections with animals, relationships to [All That Is.]

The group will be a $50/mo subscription, with an initial commitment of 6 months – some folks will get the clarity and practice they need in that time and be ready to move on into their more ending-friendly lives. Others will want to keep going deeper for longer. I want people who can bring patience and organic evolution to this work, and that’s not a matter of a few weeks.

If you’re good with getting comfy in the decay and dissolution, you’re in the right place. 🙂 You’ll need to allocate about 2 hours a week – between 15-20 minutes a day – to participating in the group and doing the work.

The Good Stuff!

There are 3 special elements to Tending The Endings.

OneGuest Teachers! we’re going to have four AMAZING guest teachers through the first year, to bring their deep wisdom to helping you tend your endings from lots of different angles. I’m wildly excited about each of these humans being part of our adventure, and once you’ve sat with them you will be too.

early summer 2018 (TBD) – Fabeku Fatunmise

August 2018 – Langston Kahn

November 2018 – Dr. Martha Jo Atkins

February 2019 – Dixie St. John

 

TwoYour Archetypal Patterns Around Endings! Each of you will receive a 30-ish-minute recorded overview about the archetypal patterns in your birth chart relate to endings, and what might be innately challenging for you personally in this area. This is obviously optional – if you don’t want to do it that’s fine! – but this is part of my particular skillset and I want to offer this sketch to help each of you navigate this process.

 

 

Three – A Special Companion! I am BEYOND delighted to provide each brave human in our group with a set of Mini Death Bunnies courtesy of the incomparable Cap’n R.M. Trotta, Pirate King of the Bardolands. These wee, wise creatures have very particular medicine around endings, and they’ll support you through this learning in ways you can’t even imagine yet.

Even better, the wise Captain will be conducting a special live video-conference call to help us learn to paint our “blank” Mini Death Bunny so it becomes an integral part of our own process. This is going to be SO FUN and that means you don’t have to know anything about art or painting – Michael will help us all to bring our Death Bunny into form in the best possible way!

Last But Not Least

This group is not for you if:

You’re in major crisis and don’t have other means of support and a place to do your work. Our group will be deeply compassionate, and I hold very strong and clear spaces, AND we are not able to be a “group therapy” level of container. I absolutely welcome raw emotion – you don’t have to be “neat and tidy” because that’s not how humans actually work – but we can’t be the primary foundation for you to rest on if you’re in a deep state of loss or grief.

You don’t understand or aren’t willing to comply with ABSOLUTE PRIVACY in regards to the group. This means NOTHING from the group is shared, or even referred to, outside the group (except in an appropriate therapeutic relationship) – not discussions, not the guest teaching calls, not our monthly calls, not any of the documents I’ll provide. Everyone says they understand this, and I also see these boundaries violated on a regular basis in other groups. I need folks to understand that I will enforce this with uncompromising consistency and swiftness.

You aren’t comfortable with yours’ and others’ deep, raw, messy emotions. One of the biggest barriers to tending our endings is being afraid or unwilling to feel our feelings, so there’s going to be some very intentional adventuring into complex and intense emotion here. It’ll be done responsibly, skillfully, and with careful attention, but it’s going to be a requirement. If this is uncomfortable for you, I completely understand – and this might not be your groove.

You know you don’t have the time or energy to really be present and contribute. I completely understand signing up for stuff that sounds great but you realistically won’t devote the time to. I’ve done this so many times! For this group, though, I’d truly rather have fewer people sign up and have every one of them show up consistently, because that’s the ONLY way this work is going to change anything for you. If you know you won’t give 15 minutes a day – or a minimum of 30 minutes every other day – to this, it might be best to circle back later.

You have a hard time with perspectives that differ from yours. When we get into some of the messy and challenging dimensions of tending our endings, it’s going to provoke strong responses in people. Lots of us have firmly-held perspectives on how Life works, and how we believe it should work – and those perspectives are going to vary pretty broadly. For this to be a space of constructive change, it’s got to be free of “should” messages from ANYONE, so if you struggle with interacting with folks who take a different approach to the hard stuff than you do, this isn’t a good fit.

You aren’t willing to do both inner and outer work. My teacher Fabeku has ingrained in me the necessity for working on both levels simultaneously. We are usually more comfortable with one than the other, but both MUST be addressed for any meaningful, lasting change to occur. This isn’t going to be just happening in your head, nor a “to-do” list in your outer world. Both are necessary.

OK, I get it, I’m IN!

Awesome. 🙂 You can sign up here and you’ll hear from me very soon!

If you have questions about the group, or whether it’s a good choice for you, or anything around it, do NOT hesitate to contact me! I am totally happy to chat about it.